Bedtime Stories 3

Bedtime last night was an abject disaster. I’ll spare the gory details, but the bottom line is, my two youngest guys didn’t go to sleep until after 11:00. Thank goodness the NCAA final was unwatchable. I’ve seen better shooting from Barney Fife, and he wasn’t even allowed to keep his bullet in his gun.

Anyway once they got over their “let’s run out of the room until someone screams at us and chases us back” routine, they at least stayed put and just wreaked havoc in their own space.

I’m going to digress here for a minute, but trust me, I do have a point. One of my favorite television shows is The Big Bang Theory (CBS Thursday 8/7 Central). For those of you not familiar, it centers around two genius physicists, Leonard (Johnny Galecki) and Sheldon (Jim Parsons) who work at Caltech. They live across the hall from a pretty waitress/actress named Penny (Kaley Cuoco). Penny has befriended these geeks and their two friends, even though she’s clearly out of their league, and although she’s very sweet, she can be kind of a badass too.

Raj, Howard, Sheldon and Leonard troll on-line forums seeking the hacker who stole Sheldon's massive World of Warcraft cache.

In last Thursday’s episode, Sheldon’s World of Warcraft account was hacked, and all the possessions of Sheldor, Level 85 Battle Elf, were stolen, from his wand of untainted power to his beloved battle ostrich. When the four guys track down the super-sized offender, and confront him, he refuses to return Sheldon’s stuff, and the anemic brainiacs back down without a fight.

Penny hears about this and hauls the guys back to finish Sheldon’s “noble quest.” She does it convincingly. By kicking the perpetrator square in the nuts.

So like three paragraphs ago, I alluded to having a point (“It makes it SO much easier for the listener!”). As Justin and Alex were in their room, decidedly not sleeping, I overheard them re-enact this final scene several times. Amazingly, they were spot-on with the dialogue.

Alex: “Justin, I’m Penny, you’re the mean guy.”
Justin: “Ok. You kick me in the place when I say it.”
Alex: “Ok.”
Justin: “Start it!”
Alex (in his “Penny” voice): “Give my friend his stuff back!”
Justin (in his deep, manly voice): “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Alex: “Well then this is your lucky day because a girl is finally going to touch you in your special place.”

Then much scuffling and giggling took place. I didn’t actually witness the staging of the kick, but it must not have been too terribly true to life because no tears were shed during the many run-throughs. Boys. God help me.

© Jennifer Alys Windholz, 2011


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