I popped in at the local coffee shop tonight to catch up on some things, and because I needed to get out of the house before anyone else crawled on me, demanded something of me, or threw something at me. Immediately before I left, Justin and Alex got into a fight over a stupid M&M action figure that was Justin’s, but had been buried in the bottom of a toy box for months until Alex unearthed it, and started to play with it, sparking an intense debate over the M&M’s rightful owner. King Solomon I am not, and I stayed neutral as Justin wrestled it away from Alex, who then tried to stomp on my laptop, and started hurling other little toys at me after I pushed him away.
So that was the scene as I left. I fully expected to come back to a full-fledged zoo. I picked up David and his friends from a movie, and dropped them off at a sleepover. I came in the door, and Alex came running to greet me.
Alex: “Hi Mommy!”
Me: “Hi guys!”
Barry: “You mean ‘guy.’ This one never sleeps.”
Me: “Where’s Justin?”
Barry: “Sleeping. Cameron’s still at the hockey game. Alex refuses to sleep.”
Alex (cheerful as ever): “I can’t sleep, Mom!”
Barry: “I sang to him, we read books. Nothing.”
Alex: “Daddy sang me three lullabies, and I still wasn’t sleeping!”
Barry: “Yep. Three lullabies.”
Alex: “He even tried to appetize me, but it didn’t work because he didn’t have a clock.”
Barry: “Yep, even tried to ‘appetize’ him, ‘alphabetize’ him. Nothing worked.”
Alex: “Mom, do you have a clock? Maybe you can appetize me.”
Me: “I have a watch. Will that work?”
How is it that one minute I’m ready to sell him on Craig’s List after ducking projectiles being thrown at my head, and then he’s so damned cute I just want to eat him up? I guess that’s what earns him his keep.
© Jennifer Alys Windholz, 2012