Lessons Learned

Things I’ve learned over the course of a so far very trying holiday weekend with my children.

  1. It is remarkably easy to go through four bags of chips in two days.
  2. It is possible to get into a heated argument about who has and has not been to Mankato.
  3. Ditto Florida.
  4. A threat of “I’ll just pee on the floor then” should be taken seriously.
  5. Selecting one child instead of another to show someone a picture on your phone will lead to fisticuffs.
  6. Chopping up freeze pops and eating them from a bowl with a spoon is grand fun.*
  7. Just because you don’t want to eat your macaroni and cheese right now doesn’t mean that the dog feels the same way.
  8. Any time there are more than two proprietors of a lemonade stand, you really need a business plan and a good accountant.
  9. Yelling “Stay IN or OUT!” every time the door opens does nothing to deter kids from going in and out of the house a thousand times.
  10. I might be warming up to the idea of year-round school.

*This may be the junior version of the Seinfeld episode where everyone is eating their candy bars with a fork and knife. Someone get me Larry David.

© Jennifer Alys Windholz, 2012


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