Today was not a good day. Damages today were in the $100+ range. I swept up shards of glass. An entire package of flour. Uncooked spaghetti noodles. I sopped water off the bathroom floor and hung wet towels out to dry. I had to hose two kids down outside, then give them showers akin to decontamination spray downs at nuclear power plants.
My patience is wearing extremely thin. Honestly, my children are lucky to be alive. For a moment I considered calling the women’s prison in Shakopee to see if I could reserve a nicer room, and maybe a job in the law library or something instead of KP. Just in case. In the meantime, I ended up putting two of them on complete lockdown this afternoon, and that seemed to have mellowed them somewhat.
So as I write this, still trying to find a way to laugh about everything, I’m going to try to count backwards from 100, and hopefully fall asleep thinking about things they do that are funny and sweet, instead of destructive and unruly. My mantra will be, “They grow up fast. They grow up fast. They grow up fast.”
© Jennifer Alys Windholz, 2012